What Lawyers Don't Want You To Know About Divorce

Author: Ed Sherman
The worst thing you can do is go to a lawyer without first becoming informed and prepared. It is not difficult to learn what you need to know, but very dangerous not to. Here's why:

1. In a divorce, the law is concerned with only three things—property, support, and parenting arrangements for minor children. That's it; that's all. If there is no legal opposition (papers filed in court) to your requests on these three subjects, getting a divorce is simply a matter of red-tape and paperwork, easy to do. The trouble comes when parties can't agree about these issues and do things that do more harm than good - like taking the divorce into a lawyer's office and into court while the disagreements are still unresolved.

2. Very few divorces hinge on valid legal issues. Over many decades, after millions of California divorces, almost every conceivable issue has already been decided in great detail and can be looked up in our enormous body of cases and statutes. This means there is only rarely a fact situation where we don't know ahead of time pretty much what any judge would order, so there's really no good legal reason for people to disagree, at least none worth the financial and emotional cost. The reason people argue is not about the law but about emotional things like hurt, fear and anger. Even more, it is because arguing is the fundamental nature of law practice and the legal system.

3. There are no solutions for divorce problems in a law office or court room. Divorce problems are almost entirely personal and emotional, but the law has no tools that can help. None. Not any. As to lawyers, nothing in law school prepares them to help people resolve disagreements based on emotional upset.

4. Retaining a lawyer almost always makes things worse rather than better. Worse than merely having no solutions for your divorce problems, our legal system - known as the adversarial system of justice - is based on conflict. It originated with trial by combat in the Middle Ages when people with a disagreement would battle before a representative of the King and the person who survived was right. A hair more civilized today, parties do legal battle in a courtroom before a judge and try to win a decision. When you take a divorce into the legal system to "settle" disagreements, things invariably get worse (no solutions there, remember?) and the level of conflict and cost go way up. Even when it's over, the parties come away broke, unhappy, disinclined to comply with orders that have been imposed, and less able to get on with rebuilding their lives or raise children cooperatively.

5. The things you can do yourself are far superior to anything a lawyer can do for you. The lawyer has no legal tools or training that can help you settle disagreements and get on with your life. But because the problems are entirely personal, between you and your spouse, there are many very specific things you can do to help reduce tension, avoid conflict, and negotiate or mediate a fair settlement. In the book, How to Solve Divorce Problems, you'll find ten specific steps to take before you start to negotiate, actions that help protect yourself, the children and the other party. These are followed by ten steps to take that will make your negotiations smoother and more effective.



About The Author

Ed Sherman is a divorce specialist attorney and award-winning author of How to Do Your Own Divorce in California. His books and software have saved millions of people billions of dollars in unnecessary attorney fees. Visit http://www.nolotech.com/

Ask And It Is Given - Does The Law Of Attraction Really Work?

Author: Lucretia Torva
By now the movie “The Secret” has been out for over a year. It's even been discussed on Oprah. Many people are ready to change their lives by using the Law of Attraction. OK, so now what? How come we can think of all the stuff we want and it doesn't show up? Where's my Genie!?!?

I believe the root cause of the appearance of failure is the difference between “Wishful thinking” and “Knowing”.

Have you ever wished you had a new car yet knew it would not appear? Sure...when there's only $56.33 in your bank account and the car you want costs over 40K, duh! You KNOW it won't materialize. That, my good friend, is wishful thinking.

Starting with a couple obvious examples, you KNOW the sky is blue and you KNOW that night will come at the end of the day. How about some other instances of knowing: have you ever known you were going to have a good time at a particular party, or that you were going to get what you wanted for Christmas, or that you were going to bump into a good friend you hadn't seen for awhile? You were using the Law of Attraction! You combined certainty with a good feeling. There must be both, just one won't bring your vision to life.

Now...do it again, deliberately and repeatedly. Consciously focus on your desired outcome and work up some really good feelings about it. Those heartfelt feelings give the Universe guidance about what you want. On the negative side, when you feel really bad about something, those feelings are intense enough to guide the Universe to give you more of whatever you feel about.

I have finally started having some success with the Law of Attraction. I guided my feelings by telling myself I am “falling in love” with my desires. The concept of “falling in love” allows you to feel deeply, those feelings that send a warm sensation through you like a sip of a fine liqueur will. It also keeps that desire in the top of your mind so you focus on it a lot and with great feeling.

Remember, combine the two aspects of Knowing and Feeling Good. As Donald Trump is quoted as saying: “As long as you're going to be thinking anyway, think big”. A variation could be: “As long as you're going to be thinking anyway, think about everything you really want!”


About The Author

By Lucretia Torva. I am a freelance artist painting murals, portraits and faux finishes in the Southwest. I have been focusing my creativity on creating the life I truly desire! Check out my site and get on my mailing list http://www.CashFlowAttract.com

The Law Of Attraction: Do You Have The Focus To Be The Best You Can Be?

Author: Lucretia Torva
To truly experience success in the physical aspect of life, we must generate it with our thoughts.

-The Fully Engaged Person of Tomorrow

We have harnessed much of the physical world. The age is now at hand to harness the energies of the mind put them at the service of humanity.

Are you fully equipped to take a valiant part in that work?

-The Cost of Mental Waste

The greatest of all eras is at hand! Are you increasing your fitness to appreciate it and take part in it, or are you merely passing your time away?

Notice for a week the incidents of your daily life--your methods of work, habits of thought, modes of recreation. You will most likely discover a waste in your present random methods of operation.

How much energy do you suppose you annually dump into the scrap-heap of wasted effort? What does this mean to you in dollars and cents? In conscious usefulness? In peace and happiness? In productivity?

Fear not...you have all the abilities necessary to change, grow and create a better version of your life. This is what the Law of Attraction is about.

-The Means to Notable Achievement

Individual mental efficiency and focus is an absolute prerequisite to any notable personal achievement or any great individual success. Your mental energies are the forces with which you wage your battles in this world. Are you prepared to direct and deploy these forces with masterful control and strategic skill? Are you prepared to use all your reserves of mental energy in the development of your personal and professional life?

A Mighty and Intelligent Power resides within you. Its marvelous resources are just now coming to be recognized.

Recent scientific research has revealed, beyond the world of the senses and beyond the domain of consciousness, a wide and, to some, hidden realm of human energies and resources. You may very well be unconscious of the powers of the mind whose marvelous breadth and depth and power have been revealed to the world by scientific experiment and spiritual exploration. You have at your command mental powers of which you have never before dreamed. It is well worth your time and effort to explore, learn and develop these talents in yourself.

TWO LAWS OF SUCCESS & ACHIEVEMENT

-“You” as a Business Corporation

As a productive being you are a kind of one-person business corporation made up of two departments, the mental and the physical.

Your mind is the executive office of this personal corporation, its directing "head." Your body is the corporation's "production facility.” Your Eyes and ears, sight and smell and touch, hands and feet--these are the implements, the equipment.

Acquiring mastery of the “head” of your corporation and the power available to you will help you meet the practical problems of your life in such a way that success will be swift and certain. Success starts with your mind and thoughts and the feelings that they create.

-Business and Activity

First of all you should accept and believe two well-settled and fundamental laws.

1. All human achievement comes about through bodily activity. In other words, we must all take action!

2. All bodily activity is caused, controlled and directed by the mind.

Give the first of these propositions but a moment's thought. You can conceive of no form of accomplishment which is not the result of some kind of physical activity. One would say that the master works of poetry, art, philosophy, religion, are products of human effort furthest removed from the material side of life, yet even these would have been lost in the minds conceiving them had they not found transmission and expression through some form of bodily activity. You will agree, therefore, that the first of these propositions is so self-evident as to not require formal proof.

The second proposition is not so easily accepted by some!

-The Enslaved Brain

Remember, when we say "mind," we are not thinking of the brain. The brain is but one of the organs of the body, and, by the terms of our proposition as stated, is as much the slave of the mind as is any other organ of the body. To say that the mind controls the body presupposes that mind and body are distinct entities, the one belonging to a spiritual world, the other to a world of matter.

That the mind is master of the body is a settled principle of science. But we realize that its acceptance may require you to lay aside some preconceived prejudices. You may know many people who believe that the mind is nothing more or less than brain activity.

-First Step Toward Self-Realization

To have any success with “Manifestation” and “The Law of Attraction” we have to accept the conclusion that our thoughts control our physical experience. It is the basis of success in creating everything we can possibly desire.


About The Author

By Lucretia Torva. I am a freelance artist painting murals, portraits and faux finishes in the Southwest. I have been focusing my creativity on creating the life I truly desire! Check out my site and get on my mailing list http://www.CashFlowAttract.com